Breaking Through (Love)

There was a topic on Social media about having patience with someone who has never been loved right before. After some consideration I felt compelled to write about this. This is a topic I believe needs to be discussed because we see to often many relationships fail and for so many different reasons we can't understand why. People get into relationships for many reasons, but true unconditional love is the one thing that can and will keep you in the relationship, not cars, money or any other false idol that may have your attention at the time. When dealing with true love their are many people who can't identify with what that looks like, feels like, sounds like because they have never been around it, never been shown or taught that kind of love. I would be the first to say that everything that is of substance should be taught at the home, but we have to realize that all things being taught from the home isn't good food for the soul. We have parents that are strictly focused on making ends meet, so that is what is taught most in the household. Then there is the party parents, the you don't need a man momma and the sex all the women you can daddy. Along with so many negatives out there love is never really being taught and even in church your taught to love the Lord more so than being taught how to engage and be truly in love and give love to another human being.

As we get older we engage in our freedom from parents and as young adults trying to navigate through this crazy maze of life, we began to learn from those we deem friends and together we go through the ups and downs that life throws our way. Sometimes the knowledge we gain is positive and then it can be really negative depending who we hang around. There are a lot of people who show you attention and it's positive at the beginning and you begin to think that this has to be love so you go with it and over time you give love and the love that is to be returned turns out to misleading, manipulation and down right evil. After several of these types of relationships you become cold and your heart is no longer able to withstand another heartbreak. You are done entertaining the thought of having love because all you've ever experienced is let down after let down. If you are reading this you would almost be sure that I'm talking about the trials and tribulations that women go through, but believe me men go through this as well. That's why men become dogs and vow to never engage in another meaningful relationship. The pain is extremely hard for men just as it is for women, don't get it twisted, men tend to hide their emotions and are not really open about sharing their hurt because of what their friends may think of them.

So as time goes on there is this woman or man who is showing you the greatest of respect and the first thing that pops up in your minds is here we go again! Truth is this person can see the person you really are on the inside, call it male and female intuition. Once a person makes a decision that this is the person they want to be in a relationship with they are there for the duration. It's something about their energy that attracts you and it's something spiritual that keeps you there. The person you are seeking is not giving in to your friendliness in fear of being hurt again, but deep deep down within they really do want to be in a loving relationship. You will have to get ready for an all out relationship battle of proving yourself worthy of this persons time because the damage they have been through is one of epic proportions and in order to unlock the key to love from them you have to not just be about the talk but your walk has to be strong as ever and you better do as you say, be on time and hopefully you don't trigger a negative reminder of what made them this defensive in the first place. It seems almost unfair, but you have to know that you are undoing the negative and attempting to peel off layers of hurt someone else built. This is when you start to thinking how do I know if he/she is worth the fight along with I'm doing all this work to be with her, I don't want to get hurt either in the process.

I responded to a friend of mine that once you allow yourself to become a part of this battle you have to bring prayer into it, because it is going to take the will of God to help you get in and it will also take the will God to allow that person to want to listen to you and become comfortable and engaging and trusting with you. Don't put in the work just to become the same as the people before you have been. We are in this thing to help each other not hurt. Some people will stay in the game to concur so don't make it easy for them to get to the prize. Anything worth having is worth working hard for and that is with anything we desire in life. The journey of love won't be easy but it can be well worth it if the two involved really want the same things and they are both honest and open with their feelings. Breaking through will show you who you really are as a person, you will ask yourself why am I doing this, it shouldn't be so hard, why is this person so hard to get through too, maybe I'm just wasting my time. You have to remember, you don't know what a person has been through to get them to this point. Sometimes it will take a miracle from God and to be honest sometimes after you felt you have done all you could to break through you may have to walk away. Now the ball is in the other person's court and they have to decide what they need to do, either live alone not trusting anymore or give love a chance again. It won't be easy because as we all know people have made it really hard to trust.

I write this because I love love! It is important that each one of us help in the fight to bring love into not only our lives but, into the lives of others. Transparency is this, I haven't always been in the mindset that I am in now. I haven't always been in the best of relationships, but after a while you learn and you grow and if you are listening God will move you into your calling and show you what your purpose is on this planet. Some people will not like who you have become and then there will be those who embrace it and applaud your growth. God will move you away from people and not only will they not understand it, neither will you, But at the time it was best! We are not meant to be out here alone, I believe there is somebody for everybody. As adults we need to stop playing games and commit to those we love and stop trying to show out for other people. The very ones you are showing out for are the ones who behind the scenes are in committed relationships.

I will leave you with this breaking through requires trust, understanding, honesty, patience and prayer among a host of other positive feelings and thoughts. If it is meant to be and you asked the coach to put you in the game, it will be! In this day and time we need each other more than ever! I say give love and the love you get back will be two fold! WSY?